WARNING: This is an opinion blog. The views expressed are those of the writer, who owns them by attaching his real name. The writer is an American and a human being who gets paid to write this opinion blog and is under no obligation to share your views on anything. If you are triggered by ideas that don’t mesh with your preferred version of reality, read on at your own risk: 

Woke this morning with a different view of Donald Trump. The scales were lifted from my lying eyes and I could see through all the hypocrisy, buffoonery and Caesar-level Narcissism to the soothing, sedative truth behind the curtain:

Trump is the BEST PRESIDENT EVER!!! Sure, he lies every time he opens his mouth, man-crushes on every dictator he meets and trashes the free press as the “enemy of the people,” but if you look past all that and bunches of other disgusting, destructive behavior, he’s really a billionaire created by God to erase the infernal works of the OBAMACHRIST!!!

Many believe the president was sent by Jesus. I say Trump may be Jesus.

No one ever expected to hear these words from me, including me. Whatever this feeling is, I want more. Words and deeds I once found deplorable (a fine word ruined by CROOKED HILLARY) no longer bother me.

I’ve got a good job, a great wife, a house, cars, food on the table, health insurance and HBO. Me and mine are doing fine with Trump and God on our side.

Close the border and hit the links, Big Guy!

Of course, the raging Trump Derangement Syndrome of my colleagues in the “fake news” keeps them from celebrating my awakening. One of the more jealous among them forwarded me an anti-Trump tweet by some communist/atheist/snowflake named Alex Cole. He founded something called acnewsitics. And he’s black. Not that it matters. Cole said Trump is: 

1) “a billionaire” but you can’t see his taxes

2) “a genius” but you can’t see his grades

3) “exonerated” but you can’t see the report.

Thanks, but NO THANKS!!! ALEX COLE!!! I DON’T NEED TO SEE HIS TAXE$!!! OR HIS GRADES!!! And you stupid libs can take Mueller’s “report” and stick it where THE SUN DON’T SHINE!!! I KNOW WHO TRUMP IS!!! 

And what day it is. Have a good one.