Bob Bolus has a long, well-documented history of saying stupid things to get attention. The auto parts magnate, convicted felon and President Trump‘s unofficial ambassador to Scran’n loves the spotlight almost as much as he enjoys getting a rise out of anyone foolish enough to take him seriously.
It’s best not to encourage Bob, but his performance at last week’s Scranton City Council meeting wasn’t just stupid. It was hateful, and as such, requires a response. Bob stood up during public comment to speak “da troot” as he sees it: City government is at risk of being infiltrated and perverted by a “queer agenda” designed to Make Scranton Gay Accommodating.
The target of Bob’s tantrum was Jessica Rothchild, an LGBTQ activist and physical therapist who won a Democratic nomination to council in the May primary. Rothchild was the top vote-getter and will likely win a council seat in November. Then she can get busy turning the Electric City into a 24-hour vegan socialist drag show.
Not on Bob’s watch. Our hero climbed down from the cab of his Trump truck and gave council the straight dope on “queers.” When the all-male council winced at the word, Bob employed that tired trick of bigoted blowhards — claiming license to use it because “those people” do.
Bob said Rothchild opened herself up to attack because she was honest about who she is. He warned that allowing a lesbian on council would send the wrong message to the impressionable children of Scran’n: It’s OK to be gay.
To its immense credit, council refused to play along. They shut Bob down for violating the rules for public comment, which Bob of course saw as a violation of his free speech rights.
“You don’t wanna hear da troot!” Bob barked, vowing to fight tooth and nail to save Scran’n from a gay invasion.
“We will do everything on the Republican side to make sure she doesn’t get this damn seat!”
I’m sure that’s true, but here’s a little “troot” for Bob Bolus: Jessica Rothchild’s strong showing in the primary is indeed a sign of a revolution and a genuine threat to a backward status quo that has kept Scranton mired in the ashes of its past. Younger, smarter people are moving into the city. They know that homosexuality is an orientation, not a lifestyle, and that no one deserves to be attacked for being honest about who he or she is.
Jessica Rothchild was born gay, and has an excellent chance of winning a council seat. Bob Bolus was born straight. Barring a miracle, he will die stupid.